Lately I have been suffering alot to do any of my favorite activities. I struggle everyday and make promises every morning to go back to reading, writing and drawing but I end up doing nothing. I have no energy or will to do anything, just laying on my bed. I keep looking everyday through the so many books that I haven’t read, pick one and that’s it. I don’t read and I don’t have the power and interest to open it and discover what is that book talking about.
I have a list that I renew every now and then about thr topics that I am going to write about. I open the notebook and try to pick any, but I feel like I am out of ideas to write anything. I just keep telling myself that tomorrow I will start everything again with even stronger will and power but I am just sleeping 💤.
Today, I pushed myself to get my drawing sketchbook and to start drawing anything. My hands were shaking at first, as if it was my first time to hold a pen. My mind was blocked, it took me a while to know exactly what to draw. I kept staring at the paper for 15 minutes doing nothing. I was not even trying to think about a pattern. That left me more disappointed. And then I started to look at my sketchbook and my drawings and I was wondering how did I draw all of these, when and from where did I start. Yes, I started by simply drawing a circle “Mandala”, I drew it and then I started to think about the fillings.
It all started to come through just like that. I wasn’t thinking, I was escaping and running away from all the negative feelings surrounding me. I was trying to remind myself with the energetic ME, the one that was reading, writing and drawing and taking care of her kids without getting tired. I wanted to retain my positivity, calmness and energy.
That is the best thing about drawing and drawing Mandala specifically. You don’t have to be an artist to draw. You can simply draw a circle and fill it with whatever fillings and doodles you want in order to get rid of all the negative thoughts you have.
I repetitively thank god for granting me this passion. When I feel down, I know how to make myself better and escape from all the disappointments and negativity with simple things. I will share with you the steps of my drawing and I hope you like it ♥️♥️