“Introvert” a whole new word for me. I have never heard it before and I didn’t know what it means. I bought this book two weeks ago by accident. It was on the best seller shelf and I had no idea what it was talking about. When I opened the first page I was amazed, it was literally talking about me. My eyes and my mouth were widely opened while reading each page. I mentioned in one of my blogs before that I grew up as a kid with insecurities and I suffered from that. Insecurities
When I was a kid, I remember everyone was looking at me as a weird girl. I didn’t like to talk a lot, I was a very shy girl. I wanted to be alone most of the times either reading or painting or even observing “daydreaming’ (The Quiet Creativity) and It was fine with me, but it seemed it was not fine with other people. I was a very anti social person. For me social gatherings were a headache. I would stay alone in the social gatherings. I didn’t have so many friends just one or two and if any of my friends was talking to a group of people I was just stepping back. I remember at school some teachers were telling me that I was barely noticed. I was that kind of a kid who doesn’t enjoy breaks and PE classes.
At that time, that was a considered not normal. Being shy was not acceptable and was a sign of low self esteem and an early sign of an unsuccessful person in the future. I remember my parents were always trying as much as they can to enroll me in social activities, but I was never pleased with that. I was being told that this will not work when you get a job and when I get older, I will never be able to speak up for myself. I remember one day, I went out with my Uncle and a group of our relatives. They were laughing and talking most of the time and I just remained quiet, listening and laughing to their jokes and then I commented on one of the jokes and they burst in laughs. My uncle looked at me and said I told you, she is the funniest girl you could ever meet. At the time, I kept wondering, why did he say that and what was he justifying?
In High School, I started to work more on myself. I wanted to be more like those popular students who were always heard and they were always initiating an activity or group work. But that was too much work for me, It was the opposite of my nature. Until, I started to read this book “Quiet Power” by Susan Cain. In this book, I didn’t only feel I am normal but I started to embrace and accept myself more. Actually, Sometimes I feel proud of myself. I remember in each page I was like, yes this me, I was doing that or I used to do that. I was relieved that there were many like me. Not only after reading this book did I understand and accept myself more but I also understood my daughter. Before, I was pushing her to be a more social person because simply I didn’t want her to be like me. I didn’t want anyone to refer to her as an anti social person – which subsequently means unsuccessful. I started to talk to her more about what she likes, rather than what I want her to do or others want her to do. I am not freaking out anymore when she prefers staying by herself coloring or playing with her toys or even watching TV.
She is an Introvert kid, that is her nature and that’s what she is and what she enjoys. She is a normal kid, she doesn’t have to be like the other kids. She is just good the way she is and I have to accept and everyone else has to accept and respect this. Introverts can be successful, they can make good leaders, but they ‘d prefer working in silence.